I started this Reverb without even watching the full CNN segment yet — just scanning, listening, reacting — and immediately felt something snap into place. Young men are listening to pure garbage and calling it gospel. And then they wonder why women may not be interested in all that. Seriously?

We might need to remind some of these men that they live in the United States — a country built on independence, optimism, and freedom. But the America they’re helping create looks nothing like the one they claim to love. When you throw a gorgeous, flawed, complex country into a chaotic spiral because your worldview is rooted in insecurity, grievance, and fantasy, you cannot expect women to flock to you. American women are independent, motivated, and evolving. The more these men collapse inward into their echo chambers, the lonelier they become — and the more warped their expectations get.

The CNN story begins with the UFC. And honestly? Let’s say it plainly: the UFC and MMA spaces have become a mask for insecurity. Not for all fans — but for far too many of the loudest voices in that universe. Trump’s constant appearance cageside isn’t an accident; it’s an intentional signal to men who feel like they’re losing their grip on themselves. The “strongman” aesthetic gives them something to cling to, even if it’s hollow.

And then we have the podcasters. The ones platforming white supremacists and pretending it’s about “hearing all sides.” The podcaster in the CNN clip tries justifying bringing on the KKK and Patriot Front by claiming he wants to hear “different viewpoints.” But that’s not journalism. That’s platforming hate. You can interview thousands of fascinating people — why focus on the most divisive, racist voices? The answer is simple and dark: controversy turns into views, views turn into money, and money feels a lot like validation to insecure men who don’t know who they are.

Which brings me to the most revealing part of the segment: the political meeting. A group of men gathered for what was supposed to be political discussion — and all they did was complain about wives and girlfriends. No policy. No ideas. Just relationship problems and Andrew Tate talking points about “training” women. Fragile doesn’t even begin to cover it. If this reflects the emotional core of certain Republican and manosphere-adjacent spaces… no wonder nothing gets done. It’s corruption mixed with emotional stuntedness.

And here’s the truth Vera Papa Sova nailed:
They don’t need more ideology — they need therapy.

That fragility bleeds straight into the “trad wife” fantasy. A fantasy built on role-playing, aesthetics, and performance — usually by white, wealthy women who can afford the lifestyle. It’s cosplay, not culture. And yet, these men believe they can “train” a woman into that role. In America? In 2025? Good luck.

Women are not shrinking. Women are not going backward. Women are not stepping into your fantasy world just to make you feel like a man. And if that is what you are looking for, you may be looking for a very long time. What you want doesn’t exist outside of curated photos and content creators playing a part. Many women who chose that life eventually leave because they lose themselves in it. Men rarely talk about that part.

This entire phenomenon — the manosphere, the podcasts, the rage, the trad wife fantasy — is built on one core truth:

They are lonely. And fear turns loneliness into resentment.

When a young man searches online for help with loneliness, depression, or identity, the algorithms don’t give him empathy — they give him anger. They give him a villain. Feminism. Women. Liberals. “The System.” And suddenly he’s part of a community built not on friendship but on shared grievance. It’s the illusion of power: trading real emotional growth for loud, cheap camaraderie built on resentment.

And if you are a man reading this, feeling the ache behind the anger, hear me clearly:
You don’t deserve this nonsense. You deserve real connection and real healing.

This next part belongs in a sidebar — because the data doesn’t lie.

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? Sidebar: Loneliness, Isolation & the Male Social Crisis (With Sources)

1. Declining Friendships & Rising Isolation

15% of men report having zero close friends (up from 3% in 1990).
? Source: AEI – Men’s Social Circles Are Shrinking

Younger men (15–34) report the highest loneliness in the West.
? Source: Gallup – Younger Men Among Loneliest in West

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2. Mental Health

Men die by suicide at 4x the rate of women.
? Source: CDC – Suicide Data

Traditional masculine norms — emotional suppression, stoicism, self-reliance — make men less likely to seek help, deepening the crisis.

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3. Algorithms as Radicalization Funnels

Neutral searches like “dating advice” or “male depression” often lead to misogynistic, red-pill, or incel content.
? Source: ISD & RESET – Algorithms as a Weapon Against Women

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And here’s the historical context nobody talks about:
The manosphere didn’t begin with Tate. It began with Tom Leykis.

My first exposure was 20 years ago while traveling with my husband. Leykis was the original “teach men not to spend more than $40 on a date” shock jock. He taught manipulation, contempt, detachment — the blueprint for today’s red-pill ideology. He retired, but his influence metastasized into YouTube, TikTok, and Discord communities spreading the exact same poison.

This is a lineage of insecurity disguised as empowerment.

And now? It’s reaching a new demographic delusion: the “trad wife” fantasy. Let’s ground that, too.

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? Sidebar: Marriage, Singleness & the Illusion of the Trad Wife (With Sources)

Marriage rates in the U.S. are not uniform — the fantasy these men cling to is demographically shrinking.

Share of Unmarried U.S. Adults (Ages 25–54)

? Source: Pew Research Center – Marriage and Cohabitation in the U.S.

• Black adults: 59% unmarried
• Hispanic adults: 40% unmarried
• White adults: 33% unmarried
• Asian adults: 31% unmarried
• Overall: 38% unmarried

The “trad wife” fantasy overwhelmingly targets white women — the group with the lowest unmarried rates. Which only amplifies the feeling of scarcity for insecure men who already believe something is being “taken” from them.

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This is why the manosphere hurts everyone — women and men alike. It replaces compassion with contempt, replaces connection with consumption, replaces self-reflection with blame.

Some men are waking up. Some are growing. Some are stepping into real adulthood. But many are still drowning in content that thrives on their pain.

And women?
We’re not shrinking. We’re not going backward.
We’re not stepping into cages — literal or ideological.

This is still America.
The land of the free.
And the home of the brave.

And I know I won’t back down.
Not to insecurity.
Not to fear.
And certainly not to the cheap, bitter illusion of power the manosphere is selling.

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For the companion piece exploring how this same fear-based system shapes white women’s political behavior, read my new Civicus × Reverb post: The Contract of Fear: How White Women Became the Shield of a Movement That Dismantles Their Own Freedom.